Category Archives: Food

What do you like here?

Restaurant servers have all the answers.  What’s in it?  What does it come with?  What does it pair well with?

The best question to ask a server, however, is not factual.  It’s their opinion.

“What do you like here?”

Get their opinion.  Lower their guard.  Start a conversation.

It’s usually fun.  And, since it’s not merely the server regurgitating what they memorized during training, it usually uncovers the best stuff on the menu.

Cruising altitude

What do you do every morning on autopilot?  Drive to work?  Your morning shower routine?  A 30 minute run?

Having to figure these things out every morning would be exhausting.  New route to work every day?  Getting cleaned up in a different order every day?  Changing the duration and path for your run every day?

Exhausting.

Same thing with making breakfast.

Figure out 1 breakfast to make.  Turn on autopilot.  And basically, go back to sleep.

Just like the real pilots.

Knowledge, power, names

Looks can be deceiving.  And so can names.

Burger King’s new fries, Satisfries, are deceiving.  So they’re low fat, apparently.  But what if you knew they should be called “Chemicalfries?”

Starbuck’s Pumpkin Spice Latte is deceiving.  It should probably be called Pumpkin Syrup Latte. All these years, I thought it was just the pumpkin spice giving it flavor.  Now I make this #PSL instead.

Facebook is deceiving.  Once I really understood its power to be an anxiety-inducing false reality, I used it a lot less.

Yes, knowledge about a name can be restrictive.  And challenging.  Especially when it means avoiding fries, PSL’s, and Facebook.

But isn’t knowledge power?

Keepin it 100

Ask any coach, executive, or leader of any kind.  It’s crucial to recognize and celebrate milestones.

Just wrapped up Spring Training?  Recognize and celebrate.

Just finished your first full year in business?  Recognize and celebrate.

Just published your 100th blog post?

Recognize!

Now let’s celebrate 100 blog posts by remembering some of the best:

Thanks to you for reading.  I write ’em for you.

Lenny James Gale

Dear Lenny Gale,

Thank you for taking the entire week to criticize celebrities for endorsing products that are marketed as stuff that makes us feel good now.  America is a free country.  We have the freedoms to buy whatever makes us feel good now.  Not in the long run.  Now.

So go ahead, you righteous fuck.  Juxtapose yourself with Larry the Cable Guy, Beyoncé, Michael Phelps and Erin Andrews.  I know what’s coming.

You want to tell us that how great Vitamix is and how it can actually make us feel good.  Ugh!

You know what, Lenny Gale?  You can take your Vitamix 7500 and shove it up your ass.  I don’t care that it helps me reduce heart burn, improve digestive health, stay refreshed and prepare easy, healthy and quick meals.

In America, we’re about feeling good now. Not after a couple weeks of making juices.  Or smoothies.  Or soup.  We want to feel good now.  Now!

Just leave America alone.

Disdainfully yours,

America

Michael Fred Phelps II

Dear Michael Phelps,

Thank you for recommending Subway sandwiches.  I’ve always wanted to be a swimmer.  Just like you.  Before eating Subway sandwiches, I’d try to swim but would just sink like a rock.  Now, after eating Subway sandwiches like you, I float with ease.

Thanks again,

The Men of Amurica

P.S. Any recommendation for ridding all this belly fat I recently took on?

The Blue Collar Briefcase

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It comes in all shapes and sizes.  But it doesn’t carry a laptop.

Why do nearly all construction workers pack a lunch?

Is it because they save money by not eating out?  Is it because their packed lunch keeps them fuller for longer?  Is it because they can save time avoiding lines at restaurants?

Maybe.  Or, it’s because that’s “what we do”.

For people who work in an office, it’s the same.  The guy who brings a bag of spinach, deli meat and hard-boiled eggs is an outsider.  It’s like a construction worker going to Potbelly for lunch.  It’s just not “what we do”.

Are you gonna have the courage to change “what we do”?

What’s in your toolkit?

If you’re a homeowner, your toolkit probably has a hammer, screwdriver and maybe a power drill.  The rest is a bunch of other stuff you only use 20% of the time.  

If you’re a small business owner, your toolkit probably has MS Office, a printer and maybe an email marketing app.  The rest is a bunch of other stuff you only use 20% of the time.

If you’re an amateur chef, your toolkit probably has some knives, pans and maybe a Vitamix. The rest is a bunch of other stuff you only use 20% of the time.

So, since all theses toolkits probably take up lots of space, and 80% of it is hardly used, why not downsize?  Someone else probably has a toolkit to replace your “bunch of other stuff”. And that’s what that toolkit does 80% of the time.