There’s a new drug out there. Taking it will result in your salary increasing 8-10x. Your salary becomes guaranteed for 8-10 years. And, it makes your job 8-10x more fun.
There are some minor side effects. But they’re negligible. And, there’s a 1% chance your employer finds out you’re taking the drug. If he does, you’ll be asked to take an unpaid vacation for 8-10 months. Your guaranteed salary stays guaranteed, though.
If you would like a sample, you can contact Ryan Braun. If he’s unavailable, you can try calling the YouWouldHaveDoneTheSameThingIfGivenTheOpportunity Clinic in Miami. Or, as they’re also known, The 8-10 Clinic.